Monday, September 24, 2012

i'm getting married, singaporean malay style

As a follow-up to my earlier blog entry suggesting that someone should do something like the brilliantly hilarious My Friends Are Married in the local Malay wedding preparation context.... I thought, oh hey, maybe I'll give it a shot hahaha ok here goes here goes:

When your relatives hear you're getting engaged and clamour to sponsor stuff for dulangs even though you've made it clear that you do not want to have any dulang exchange:

 (Source: Unknown)

When your "small intimate engagement" explodes into a 10 thousand-strong carnival-like shebang:

(Source:Unknown)

When you realize that other brides-to-be start asking for quotes and book wedding vendors two years in advance:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When the severity of the situation hits you in the face and you're ready to join the race for weddings vendors even though your wedding is two freaking years away:

(Source: Unknown)

When you start researching for your wedding and have to recce through ten thousand wedding vendors for ten thousand wedding-related things:

(Source: Running Man Gifs)

When you compare quotes and find out that your favourite vendor is $XXXX lesser than you expected and is waaayyyyy within your budget:

(Source: Unknown)

When your husband-to-be tells you to wait for another month just in case you see someone else you might like before securing a booking:

(Source: Unknown)

When your first choice vendor tells you he/she is fully booked on your wedding weekend:


(Source: Reaction Gifs)

When your favourite wedding vendor confirms that he/she is available for your wedding date:

 (Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When you register one minute too late and your #1 choice tok kadi is no longer available on your solemnization date and time:

(Source: Unknown)

When you see gorgeous pictures of the latest works from your favourite vendors on Facebook:

(Source: Unknown)

When you see pictures of beautifully executed weddings online:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

 When your bride-to-be girlfriend gives you the lowdown on the latest controversy involving a wedding vendor mudslinging another wedding vendor on Facebook:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When you see angry customers viciously attacking a lousy wedding vendor on Facebook:

(Source: Unknown)

When you see 2015/2016 brides-to-be asking wedding vendors for quotations on Facebook:

(Source: Unknown)

 When your mum asks you to choose decor that looks like it rightfully belongs in a museum:

(Source: Unknown) 

When you hear about irresponsible lousy vendors messing up couples' weddings:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your sister tells you she will sponsor one of your wedding items for you:

(Source: Reaction Gifs)

When your vendor tells you they cannot execute your ideas because your ideas are not feasible:

(Source: Fuck Yeah Reactions)

When your vendor tells you to pay a ridiculous amount of money for additional items in your package:

(Source: Reactions Gif)

When your bridal house tells you the mak andam that you want is no longer available on your date:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your parents won't stop talking about their friend's cousin's brother-in-law's anak punya wedding that had all the elements they want for your wedding:

 (Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your parents tell you not to choose baju pengantin that are outdated:

(Source: Unknown)

When your mum recommends her "mak andam friend" who did bridal make-up 20 years ago:

(Source: Awesome Gifs)

When your future mother-in-law tells you she wants to choose your baju pengantin for you:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your parents tell you the number of guests they're inviting:

(Source: Unknown)

When your mum tells you to learn to be more "tertib" because you're going to be someone's wife:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your parents start showing you off as "the next bakal pengantin" at a relative's wedding:

(Source: Reaction Gifs)

When your pesky relatives start listing down the things that you should and shouldn't do or have at your wedding:

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9sf37eJB31ql5yr7o1_400.gif 
(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your aunt asks you how much hantaran your future husband is giving you:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your aunt starts telling everyone that her daughter's duit hantaran is more than yours:

(Source: Reaction Gifs)

When your relatives start bragging about how their friends, who are wedding vendors in the local industry, are so much better than the vendors you've chosen for your wedding:

(Source: Unknown)

When your relatives keep trying to convince your parents that a combined wedding reception will never work:

(Source: Fuck Yeah Reactions)

When your relatives keep telling your parents that your chosen wedding venue is too far / too stuffy / too small / too low-class / too troublesome:

(Source: Unknown)

When your relatives won't stop criticizing and finding fault with your wedding vendor choices:

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ltqntqxjRC1qiia8n.gif
(Source: Unknown)

When your bapak punya sedara punya makcik punya anak tells you to lose some weight or else you'll be too fat to fit into your baju pengantin:

 (Source: Unknown)

When your uncle shows you sample of the gubahan that he'll be doing for your dulangs and it looks like anak tupai kena langgar lorry:

(Source: Unknown)

When you see a paper laptop as a hantaran gift on someone's dulang (#truestory):

(Source: Unknown)

When friends tell you to let your parents decide everything about your wedding because it's "their majlis, even though you're paying for most it":

 
(Source: Unknown)

 When your best friend tells you she can't make it for your wedding:

(Source: Unknown)

When your bridesmaids asks what to expect at your wedding:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your husband-to-be suggests taking outfits from the basic range "since they look the same as the outfits in the exclusive range anyway":

(Source: Running Man Gifs)

When your husband-to-be tells you that "your sirih junjung not matching your event decor can't possibly be a serious issue": 

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your husband-to-be tells you to choose a cheaper alternative (that you do not like) so you don't bust your budget:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When someone tells you that "chiavari chairs make no difference to your wedding decor":

(Source: Unknown)

When someone tells you that you've made the right decision in choosing your wedding vendors:

(Source: Unknown)

 When another bride-to-be gushes to you about your favourite wedding vendor:

(Source: Unknown)

When another bride-to-be tells you that her vendor costs "$XXXX more than yours":

(Source: Reaction Gifs)

When another bride-to-be tells you your wedding vendors aren't very good at what they do:

 (Source: Reality TV Gifs)
When another bride-to-be refuses to believe you when you tell her the negative stories you've heard about a wedding vendor she chose:


(Source: Unknown)

When your girlfriend chooses a vendor you don't really fancy:

(Source: Unknown)

When someone gushes about a wedding vendor you and your girlfriends don't think highly about:

(Source: Awesome Gifs)

When someone posts on a forum about how cheap and good their vendors are when you know they actually charge higher than market rate:

(Source: Reaction Gifs)

When you see a bride-to-be badgering vendors with inane questions on Facebook and bombarding other brides-to-be for things already answered on a wedding forum:

(Source: Unknown)

When you hear or see brides-to-be gush about wanting the best vendors but at the same time, whine about how they're not willing to spend the money required for it:

 (Source: Awesome Gifs)

When another bride-to-be dodges your questions because she does not want to share contacts:

(Source: Unknown)

 When your (single) girlfriend tells you to stop talking about weddings:

(Source: Reality TV Gifs)

When your (single) girlfriend tells you to seriously stop talking about weddings:

(Source: Fuck Yeah Reactions)

 When you look at your wedding budget checklist and start calculating the expenses required:

 (Source: Unknown)

 When vendors start asking you to make the final payments:

  (Source: Unknown)

When your wedding vendor pulls out three weeks before your majlis:


(Source: Reality TV Stars)

When your sister reminds you that this will be your last raya with your family (as a single) before you get married:

(Source: Unknown)

When you realize you've lost 20kg just in time for your wedding:

 (Source: Fuck Yeah Reactions)

When you realize your wedding is this weekend: 

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4taheGUsH1rp3757.gif
(Source: Unknown)

Hahahahaha ok ok not as hilarious as My Friends Are Married but I tried. Anyway this is just for the lulz, so some of the items above are inspired by stuff or people I've seen or heard after I started on this wedding preparation journey, whereas some are just exaggerated versions of events that I've seen happening to my girlfriends or other brides-to-be before.

(Side note: I do not encourage the terrible behaviour and excessive bridezillaness in some of the scenarios displayed above ok! That said, you should always strive to be a happy glowing bride instead of a bridezilla ok, because nobody likes a bridezilla... unless they fall flat on their face.)

I'd like to dedicate the last gif to my dear girlfriend Nani though, because her wedding is this Saturday and damn woman is freaking out amidst the flurry of last minute wedding-related activities. Hang in there, woman, just remember that all the madness will matter no more once you officiate your forever after in... what? 5 days? All your intense planning, ideas, brainstorming, tears and sweat coming together to give you the biggest day of your life!

See you in your pengantin glory when September ends, girlfriend.

[Edit: For continuation of this entry, click here]

16 comments:

  1. eh samerrrr! lol!
    you had me at "When your first choice vendor tells you he/she is fully booked on your wedding weekend". and right now, i'm trying my hardest not to be the dude in the last gif.

    kudos for this entry!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha thanks! very tak glamour if bakal pengantin kena breath through a paper bag so hang in there yo!

      Delete
  2. babe! so F-true and F-lulz! enjoy ur post. How about on a post on honeymoon ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lulzzz glad you enjoyed it! alamak honeymoon ada tricky sikit, maybe when i start researching for honeymoon, i'll see if i get inspired haha

      Delete
  3. Totally awesome post! Almost as hilarious as My Friends Are Married. But then again your normal posts already have me ROFL-ing :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. aiyo you're so nice! thank you!

      my eyes almost popped out looking through all the gifs to include into this entry (it got quite addictive after awhile hahaha) but i definitely enjoyed drafting this post :D

      Delete
  4. hahah this is so funny! i love all your posts, but this takes the cake! i shared this on my facebook wall, hope you don't mind! :)

    -amalina.
    (a friend of ross (rippinkittin), cousin of salina (linsy69) and.. just one of your many avid readers!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oh hello!!!

      i've heard your name before from my boyfriend - i think ross mentioned your name to him or something and you guys terserempak for lunch before kan? he was asking me whether i knew you...

      so nice to finally put a person (and a face) to the name!

      and sure, share all you want, babe. i enjoyed drafting this post and it's nice to know others enjoy it as well ^^

      Delete
  5. OMG babe! This is hilarious! I can definitely relate to a number of gifs here... hehe.

    ReplyDelete
  6. HAHAHAHAHA I SERIOUSLY CANNOT TASHAN LAUGHING!

    ReplyDelete
  7. hahahah LOL OMG So funny im sharing this on my FB

    ReplyDelete
  8. Cute one! And, really cool~ Thanks for the hardwork!
    Thanks for creating this "blog" it does help a lot to those BTBs!
    Zaman akak dulu takde pung..kena research sendiri and based on own bajet.And , to the entend ambil Wedding Insurance which now no more I guess...But Alhamdulillah , berjalan dgn lancar..:-)

    All the best and keep up writing :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. awww thank you!!! hehe tak tau pulak dulu ada wedding insurance?!?!?!

      and insya Allah, thank you again for your well wishes :D

      Delete