Wednesday, April 17, 2013

i'm getting married, singaporean malay style (part ll)

I've been itching to add on more gifs so bad ever since my last "I'm getting married, Singaporean Malay style" blog entry, and since adding new gifs to the previous entry macam no kickz no ballz, I've decided to just buka a new entry so boleh sumbat lagi banyak gifs muahahaha. So here we go again, suckers!

When your bridal house launches their new baju collection in time for your fitting:


When your vendor contacts you about additional payment because they "miscalculated the first time round":


When you've already booked a wedding vendor you love but suddenly discover another vendor you love EVEN MORE:


When new wedding vendors launch their new businesses after you've settled for another vendor (and you love their work):


When your fiance tells you it doesn't make sense to forfeit your bridal house deposit just because "the other bridal house you just discovered has prettier sanggul lintang":


When you see wedding vendors start off their Facebook wall update with "LAST WEEKEND WE HAD A BAD EXPERIENCE WITH...":


When wedding vendors get overly defensive when you ask about the bad reviews you've heard about them:



When your vendor tells you that it might be impossible to get what you initially requested for:


When your caterer says you'll need to top up $500 for two buffet lines instead of one:


When your wedding DJ tells you to prepare declarations of love for each other:



When you attend a wedding and you recognize the traits of your favourite vendor:


When you meet your wedding vendor choices for the first time:


When wedding vendors post a picture of their recent decor work and describes the colour as salmon when it's actually bright pink:


When wedding vendors promote their chiavari chairs as "chivalry chairs":


When a potential vendor takes more than five working days to reply to your emails/messages:


When you hear someone using the sentence "planning for our pre-wedding honeymoon":

 

When someone asks you what BTB, FFIL, FMIL, HTB, MUA means:


When another bride-to-be squeals about the same wedding idea for the 3275745th time:


 When another bride-to-be keeps posting her wedding countdown every freaking week for the next 24 months:


When another bride-to-be talks about how she has been practicing her crying in front of the mirror everyday so she will have the "right crying look" after her nikah:


When another bride-to-be raves about a bridal outfit that has ruffles on the shoulders, ruffles on the neckline, ruffles on the chest, ruffles on the waist, ruffles on the hems, ruffles on the sleeves:


When another bride-to-be tells you that "good things come to those who wait" after you tell her to start booking vendors if she wants the popular and/or good ones:


When another bride-to-be tells you she engaged "Bridal X" for her wedding after you've finished ratting about how gaudy and horrible their outfits and make-up are:


When girls who are known to be very fussy and have not started on any wedding preparations start preaching on and on and on and one and on and on and on and one and on and on about how they will never spend more than a few thousand dollars on their weddings:


When someone tells you she tried your caterer's food from another wedding and it's "nothing special":


When someone tells you she wants a to hold a super grand wedding at a super exclusive venue in Singapore with a budget of S$10,000 for everything:


When someone tells you she's been engaged to her fiance for seven years:


When your girlfriend who is about to start planning her wedding and asks you how the experience has been like for you:


When your newly engaged girlfriend asks whether she can start booking vendors five months before her wedding:


When your newly engaged girlfriend squeals about planning "the most perfect wedding ever":


When you girlfriend tells you she is going to tell her parents about her plan to not have a majlis persandingan:



When your girlfriend tells you she booked a make-up artist who you think makes up brides like sundel bolong:


When your girlfriend won't stop bitching about every single wedding vendor you recommend her:


When your girlfriend tells you a wedding vendor sucks because they didn't reply her email within 24 hours:


When your girlfriend tells you that the package you booked is now at 50% off at a recent wedding exhibition:


When your girlfriend tells you the wedding vendor you're intending to book just increased their prices last week:


 When your girlfriend wails about not getting the wedding vendor she's been eyeing because she wanted to "wait and see":



 When your girlfriend tells you you do not need a photobooth at your wedding reception:


When your aunt tells you your pelamin will look "very kosong" and "tak lawa" if you don't put ten thousand and one plants at the sides:


When your aunts and uncles ask whether they can invite their primary school friends, secondary school friends, madrasah friends, kebayarobics friends, kedai kopi friends to your wedding:

 

When your dad says you must have sireh dara at your wedding because "kalau tak, nanti ape orang kata":


When your mum tells you that all your distant relatives will not attend your wedding if you do not attend theirs or their children's:


When your mum warns you that everyone will hate your bridal outfits:



When your dad tells you he needs more invitation cards because he "needs to extend the invites to the people working at the coffeeshop where he has his lunch at every workday":


When your dad insists you cancel your booking with your favourite caterer because "he already asked his friend to cater for your reception":


When your parents tell you exchanging ten dulangs for your wedding is not enough:

 

When your parents ask you whether you've already settled the berkat budak budak:


When your parents insist that you "must pergi sembah menyembah after the wedding":


 When your parents agree to have no karaoke at your wedding:


When your cousin tells you a one-seater kerusi pengantin will not look nice on your dias:


When your cousin asks whether you mind him wearing a different colour from the colour you've assigned your extended family members to wear to your wedding reception because it's difficult to find the shade you've chosen:


When your cousins tell you that they'll do a Harlem Shake segment during your wedding:


When your aunt insists that you engage her son's silat team to do a silat performance during your wedding for the 100000th even though you already told her your wedding itinerary is already very tight:


When your fiance asks whether you're willing to change your bridal outfits to appease his relatives who think your choices are ugly: 


When your fiance suggests cutting out wedding photography and videography to save on budget because "our relatives will take photos and videos of the reception anyway":


When your fiance tells you there is no way you can enforce a "No Babies and No Children" ban at your wedding:


When your fiance asks whether you've confirmed orders with the wedding card designer:



When your fiance reminds you to let the caterers know your guestlist numbers by next week:


 When your fiance asks whether you can finish finalizing the wedding songlist in two months' time:


When your fiance asks you whether you've already shortlisted a list of tok kadi names for your wedding:


When your fiance asks you to repeat the proposed wedding itinerary for the 3459485875384th time:


When your fiance asks whether you can start discussing about having a baby after the wedding:


 When you compliment someone's wedding and she replies that she paid close to SGD100,000 for it:


When someone asks why you've finished booking all your vendors when your wedding is two years away:


When someone asks HOW you managed to book all your vendors when your wedding is two years away:


When you realize you could've spent your money on three holiday trips instead of catering for one wedding reception:



[Thanks Nina for the inspiration! HAHAHA]

When someones asks whether you've started on your diet to have a wedding-ready body:


When you've started on your bridal diet and it's time for your weekly 'cheat day':


When your girlfriend recommends grilled chicken, steamed salmon and salads for your bridal diet meal plans:


 When someone compliments you on your bridal weight loss:


When you cannot find an air-conditioned wedding venue that allows onsite cooking and external vendors and can fit combined reception of more than 1000pax:


When you find out that the CC venue you want has already been booked for CC activities:


When the liaison officer for your wedding venue tells you there is a double booking on your wedding date and asks whether you are willing to give up the venue to the other couple:


When your bridal house asks whether you want Outfit A, Outfit B or Outfit C for your dinner reception:


When your future mother-in-law complements you on your choice of bridal andaman:

When your future parents-in-law approve your proposed idea for wedding decor:


When someone asks you to be her bridesmaid so you can help her neutralize the fight between her existing bridesmaids:


When your bridesmaid asks you whether her new 4-inch heels will match her bridesmaid outfit:


When your girlfriend tells you she won't be able to be your bridesmaid one month before the wedding:


When someone suggests you invite your fiance's guy friends to act as strippers for your bachelorette party:


When someone looks like this on her wedding day:



And you want to try and be happy for her:


When your make-up artist asks whether you want three layers of nose shading for your wedding make-up:


When you hear about parents selling off their flat just to fund their anak's wedding:


When someone you weren't planning to invite to your wedding squeals "Omg I can't wait to go to your wedding!":


When you cannot seem to find bridal shoes that will match all your pengantin outfits:


When you realize your period will end in time for your first night together:


When you see your wedding fund hit a five-digit figure for the first time:


When your aunt tells you her daughter is going to have a pelamin that is bigger than yours:


When your relative tells you her daughter's wedding will be better than yours because she has "better vendors":


When your bitchy relative starts criticizing your vendor choices:


When you find out someone's parents belum bayar balik hutang for the duit used for their anak's majlis tunang two years ago:


When you can't afford to criticize or offend anyone nearer to your wedding because must jaga pantang:


When someone asks whether you can help plan her wedding after you're done with yours:

 When you accidentally find out that someone you dated before your fiance is getting married on the same day as you and half of his vendors are the same as yours:

(#truestory haha this one's for you, Mr. K!)

When colleagues call your office extension to ask if you're the person behind the bride-to-be blog they're reading:

(Also #truestory hahahahaha HI GIRLS! Korang kerja ke baca blog ni???)

When friends ask how you manage work, school, family, friends, fiance, wedding planning, honeymoon research, interior design planning and still get to blog actively:



 HAHAHA OK THATZZZ ITZZZZZ FOR TODAY FELLAZZZ!!!

But before I finish off this entry, I'd also like to use this opportunity to welcome all 2015 brides-to-be into the wonderfully crazy world of wedding planning for Malay weddings in Singapore! All the best for your Amazing Malay Wedding Planning Race ye! 

Bride-to-be chest pump!


Eh, selalunya benda benda gini memang trend to buat trilogy kan. Maybe I should post another one to complete this "trilogy" eh. Hur hur.

Anywaaaaay, as I've mentioned in my earlier entry, this is just for the lulz, so some of the items above are inspired by stuff or people I've seen or heard after I started on this wedding preparation journey, whereas some are just exaggerated versions of events that I've seen happening to my girlfriends or other brides-to-be before.

Note: One or two gifs are from Reaction Gifs but most of them were hijacked from Reality TV Gifs and My Friends Are Married, which are my most favouritest websites EVAR.

32 comments:

  1. THIS IS HILARIOUS LAH FARHANA! Haha. I had a good lunchtime laugh! Omg, soooo funny. Some colleagues gave me the look like 'deknih confirm dah lose it sebab stress sangat plan wedding agaknya.' Hahaha! LOVE this sangat2.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha thank you! happy to give you a good lunchtime laugh hehe

      takde kerja cari kerja so gini lah jadinya :p

      Delete
  2. never ever read KK at work. kena control laughter lah sey! hopefully i get to be 2015 BTB! anyway..after your wedding..upgrade the blog to KKK lah..kahwin khronicles konsultant! =))))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oooooh insya Allah! hopefully it works out and you'll enjoy the wedding preparation journey as much as i and other btbs have!

      and wahhhhh ada masa depan eh jadi kahwin khronicles konsultant lol no lah nanti lepas kahwing dah ada husbern to layan and jaga segala... kecoh! hehe

      Delete
  3. "When your wedding DJ tells you to prepare declarations of love for each other"

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ZOMGGG THIS IS WEDDING NIGHTMARE SEH

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. STOP IT LAH SEH NI!!!!!

      sometimes i cringe when i hear couples kena sabo buat gini! i mean, i love my friends and all and i'm happy for all of them but bila tengok dorang struggle to fight the embarassment macam kesian lah sangat hur hur

      YOUR WEDDING DJ WAS SOOOOO MEAN TO DO THAT TO YOU PLS!!!

      Delete
    2. MEMANGGGGGGGGG!!! sampai mati i will pangkah!

      JUST LEAVE US ALONE LAHHH we are already on "display" for that day, it's just HORRIBLE when you make it a JOKE seh.

      Delete
  4. "When your wedding DJ tells you to prepare declarations of love for each other" LOLOLOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. it's ok if the couple is ok with it, but ada boleh nampak seh dorang struggle with the words and are embarassed by what they have to say. kesian! such DJs are so mean!

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    2. I can just imagine seh kena caught off guard *malu*

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  5. i had it at

    When wedding vendors promote their chiavari chairs as "chivalry chairs":

    hahahahahahhahahahahaha
    ZOMG!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HAVE YOU SEEN VENDORS YANG BUAT GINI NOT???!!!

      i've seen it three times ok, macam nak hentak itu "chivalry chair" kat dahi

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. hehe thank youuuuuuuuu! felt like a million and one years trying to finish this entry, it was so fun to draft!

      Delete
  7. hahahaha reading this in the office and trying to control laughter! :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. no need to control, just laugh everything out lah hur hur :p

      Delete
  8. So funny!!! Ketawa kekek kekek kat atas katil..*ROBL*...haha...*btb chest bump*

    ReplyDelete
  9. powerrr! i was SO cameron diaz at mine ok!
    and TOP! saranghaaaaae! hahaha!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahahahaha i'm expecting to be macam cameron diaz punya gif when my turn gets nearer!!! macam cameron diaz dalam gif aje lah, bukan macam cameron diaz the person.

      and yay <3 <3 <3 TOPPPPPPPPPPPPP

      i actually had about 10 to 12 gifs of him ok, pastu cut down sebab macam excessive sangat muka dia hurhur

      Delete
  10. this entry super epic. can't stop sniggering at work when i'm supposed to be marking. a snort escaped ok and i had to look furtively around if anyone heard...=)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha thank you! sorry i made you snort out loud at work but hope it made your day! :D

      Delete
  11. hahahaha you ah. betul ah....mintak kena 21-gun salute dari all the BTBs for being the ever informative, ever funny, ever brilliant, ever reliant kakak kahwing EVAAAAA

    you bilang jer you nak, kita semua line up lah sey

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol stop it eh tak agak agak sampai nak 21-gun salute segala! :p

      Delete
  12. hahaha. there's one more! when all your family members coax or rather force you to sing cos they say it's the norm. -__- because i know my future in laws will do that to us :'(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oh no!!!!! but are you willing to sing, babe??? if you memang suka nyanyi not a problem ah hehe. but if like me, you hate singing then that would suck SO BAD

      Delete
    2. ohh tidakkk!!! tak sanggup nak nyanyi.. kalau dlm toilet tu boleh lah jerit jerit.. Hopefully they won't force us to sing eh.. :s

      Delete
  13. Hahahaha... Lu kecoh ah babe... LOL! Ketawa terbahak-bahak sakkk...

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    Replies
    1. gua tak kecoh brudder... plan untuk orang melayu punya kahwing yang kecoh, brudder! hahahahaha

      Delete
  14. always like to read this and laugh to entertain myself and I relaaxxx

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  15. Came upon your blog while researching for my sister's wedding. You are bloody hilarious - love your blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ngawwwww thank you! good luck to you and your sister!

      Delete